Archive for October, 2014

Selling illegal drugs

Selling illegal drugs can be highly dangerous and getting caught can mean many years behind bars. It’s best not to get caught, and if you do, to know some people in the business to sell out to reduce your sentence. The upside means that you can make lots of money. College is a costly investment, and selling Cocaine, Crystal methamphetamines, or Marijuana in states where it’s still illegal can be a strong source of revenue.

Robbing banks

Banks are giant vaults of cash just sitting around the country. You’ll probably need to get in touch with people who’ve pulled this off before. But don’t talk to anyone in prison, because that means they didn’t do a very good job. Generally smaller banks in quieter neighborhoods will have less intense security measures making a successful heist more likely. Robbing a bank will involve at least one other partner in crime. Think of the Dirt Bike and Truck routine from The Place Beyond The Pines. Don’t hit the same area twice and don’t press your luck. Be loud, aggressive, get in and out.

Taking hostages

Consider abducting someone rich yet unloved. Like Kanye West or Alec Baldwin. This way the FBI won’t put in too much effort to stop you but you can still get enough money to pay for school. Like robbing banks, taking hostages is no solo operation. You’ll need to get enough money to split between you and your partners.

Ripping off cars

College is expensive, especially if you’re attending a private institution or college out of state. Don’t bother with small-time stuff like Hondas or used Buicks. Vehicles like New Mustangs, Chargers/300s/Challengers, Lexuses, or Mercedes’ bring in a lot of value. Chop shops look to make a profit themselves, so you’ll probably have to make 15-20 successful runs before you’ve saved up enough for a four-year degree. Never hit the same county twice and make sure the cops are distracted with something else at the time. You don’t want to get caught. It’s hard to go to college while you’re in federal prison.

Student Loans

Ha ha ha. I’m just kidding, what kind of moron would take out a loan to go to college. That’s just crazy.

The NFL media has already begun forecasting doom and gloom on Foxboro’s team after New England visited Arrowhead stadium and got flattened 41-14. Brady looked like a senile old man at times in Kansas City throwing a late pass to Edelman when he could have dived for the first down. But that’s splitting hairs in a horrific loss for New England created by their inability to stop Jamaal Charles and their inability to protect their passer. Belichick’s Belichickian insistence on not overpaying for aging talent (and trading 6-time pro-bowler Logan Mankins) seems to have come at the worst time possible as the Patriots offensive line is struggling severely. For all we know, Mankins would have gotten injured just the same or his level of play would be just as poor as the rest of the line’s and New England would be sitting in a similar spot. But the world will never know. The world only knows that New England’s offensive line is definitely struggling without him.

The lack of pass protection only highlights the Patriots’ lack of receiving weapons. Gone are the days when the Patriots had Rob Gronkowski, Aaron Hernandez and a spritely Wes Welker to dissect opposing secondaries. In 2014, their top receiving threat is a tie between ever-injured Rob Gronkowski and underwhelming Julian Edelman. Losing to the Chiefs (a strong AFC playoff team) on their turf shouldn’t be too shocking. Chiefs’ head coach Andy Reid and QB Alex Smith have decades of big game experience between them.

Negativity aside, the Patriots weren’t exactly towering football behemoths at the start of 2014. Sure, the signing of Darrelle Revis and Brandon Browner look great on paper. But these guys can’t play on the line, and they don’t catch any passes. The Patriots two greatest areas of needs. The Patriots are certainly a capable team, but they can’t force their will on opponents like they used to. They need to play to their strengths. And no one can do that better than salty captain of the ship Bill Belichick.

New England hosts undefeated Cincinnati next Sunday night at home. A win in Foxborough would re-energize the embattled Patriots team, but first they’ll have to earn it.